You can keep your lobsters with their snooty tails and your scallops with their delicate little berets — here in the San Francisco Bay Area, we worship at the altar of Dungeness crab. The crack of shell against mallet? That’s our church bell. Melted butter? That’s holy water.

I was born in this fog-soaked cradle of seafood glory, where November 16 once reliably meant the start of crab season and the countdown to my December birthday feast. Sagittarius doesn’t need sunshine — we prefer claws.

Then came the dark years…
Domoic acid. Migrating whales. Delayed openings. Broken hearts.
Foodies wept into their sourdough loaves.

But I?
I adapted.
I evolved.
I formed… a cult. (A delicious cult.)

Every year my friends and I created what can only be called F-movies — so bad they’re fabulous — featuring buckets of crab, too much wine, and the annual ceremonial death of Paul McGregor. Bless him. A true hero. A true martyr. A true crab casualty.

As life shifted, houses sold, vans became homes, and Joe’s Crab Shack went to the great franchise graveyard in the sky — the tradition refused to die.

This gallery is my thank-you letter to:

• The Bay Area

• The ocean

• The brave crabs who gave their lives for deliciousness

• And the weird, wonderful humans who made every birthday unforgettable

Foodies of Earth — this one’s for you.

🦀 Welcome to my Dungeness Crab Obsession.🍽️
Please wipe your hands before scrolling — butter ruins screens.

🎬 Tré Taylor’s Birthday Crab Dinner Horror Comedy Film Series: An Origin Story

Long before I was boiling crustaceans in parking lots and shooting my friends on-camera for laughs, when I saw 1980 movie Airplane! - I whispered to myself, “Someday, I will make the stupidest, dumbest, most ridiculous films ever put on Earth.” Dyslexia may have made scripts a nightmare, but improv was my jet fuel — and I grew up with a soundtrack scoring every ridiculous moment of my life.

So when the Dungeness season synced with my December birthday and a table full of high friends, butter, and crab-cracking tools appeared… destiny called, wearing a bib. Thus began a saga of low-budget seafood horror that would make even Leslie Nielsen proud. 🎉🦀💀

Do stupid fun stuff

with your goofy fun friends!

IT KEEPS YOU YOUNG!